Monday, January 16, 2012

Two Things That Should Never Be Left Unsaid

"I love you" and "I forgive you", they should never be just implied, inferred, or said in any way that leaves the hearer wondering if that's what you meant.

The first I learned from my family and to this day it comforts me greatly that even though I didn't get to talk to my dad on the day before he died when he was calling everyone (I didn't have a phone) that the last thing I said to him the last time that I talked to him was "I love you." It's the last thing I say to Mark each time he leaves out the door or right before I fall asleep and the last thing that I say to John every time I pull out his hearing aids for bed, or to clean them. If you love someone, let them know, and always remember nothing says 'I love you' like just saying it.

The second I learned from Mark. These were not common words in my family growing up, not that we didn't forgive each other, just that it was never said in so many words. It's also not something that I commonly hear, sadly even amongst people in church. Sometimes the words are easy to say, other times they are really hard, especially if I am very hurt and even more so if I doubt the person really means to change, but I can't judge another's heart, I can only hear what they say and when someone says 'I'm sorry' the right answer is always 'I forgive you'. I try to remember that Christ told Peter that he was to forgive his brother 70 x 7 times, that's a lot, and he didn't mean to count up to there and then the next 'I'm sorry' was to be met with anything other than 'I forgive you'. I always try to remember that my sins against God are legion compared to even the worst things done to me by any person, Christ died for me and I am forgiven, therefore I can say 'I forgive you' to those who say they are sorry for what they have done.

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